Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
