i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize