She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize