Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
