we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
