On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
