i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
