on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
