you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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