so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
