I wish i was in the wii world.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
