Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
