Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
You've changed since you got that strap on
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize