My friends, they love my intelligence
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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