You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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