two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
