I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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