Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
