Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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