Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
