I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
