Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
