one two three fourrrrnication!
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
