you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I think your dad took our porno
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
