I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
You dont lie about slip and slides
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
