I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
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