fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
