Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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