I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
