if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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