I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
