Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
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