I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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