Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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