Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize