im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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