I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize