i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Randomize
