went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
