Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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