Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize