I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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