I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
