her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
