some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
soo... how was my night?
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