dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Randomize
