I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
