Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
