he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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