as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
either way he was missing a nipple.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
